My birthday....and aging
Well, here it is, May 23...my birthday. I guess I really don't feel any older...lol. Maybe that's because it isn't official until 10 pm tonight...lol So, I guess I'm technically not 52 yet! lol
I remember a few years back, around my birthday, and my Granny's also.... her's was May 29th, we were talking about birthdays, and getting older. I'll never forget what she told me then.... "well I guess getting older sure beats the alternative! If I wasn't getting any older, I'd be dead!" lol Guess I'd never really thought about it that way! hahahaha She made it to 97...so I suppose I will have to start looking at it that way.
I really don't know where time goes. It seems, at times, that it moves sooooo slowly, and then at others, it seems to just fly by. I often wonder about that. I look back at about age 15...especailly, just before getting my license....and I remember feeling like 16 was NEVER going to get here, and it seemed to be an eternity before I got my license. We always seem to look forward to certain ages...16....then it's 21, so we can go out and drink! lol At the time, it seemed like it took forever for those ages to come, and now, here I am at 52....wondering where in the world the past 30 yrs. have gone to.
My babies, or at least two of them, are married, and have babies of their own. And when I look at them, it is so hard to imagine them as anything but the 2 little boys that use to run around our house...drivin' me crazy...lol. And now, here they are, fathers themselves. Moriah is 15...talkin' about driving permits....but she should still be the pretty little girl that I would dress up, and add bows to her hair. Where has it all gone?
I look back on my own life...so many of the wonderful memories that flood my mind. Memories of my mom and dad, my Granny and Poppy...My Aunt Jo...so many people, that have meant so much to me in my life. Now, so many of them are gone. It makes me feel as if parts of my life are just gone forever...never to return. Of course, there are always the memories, and they are beautiful ones...but...as I get older, I just long for the times when those memories were present day. I watched an old video that my mom had made for me...made from old home movies...when I was younger. The memories were so clear, and vivid. And it made me wish for those days again. One minute they would make me smile, and the next, tears would fill my eyes....knowing that these people are now gone from my life. All these memories have meant so much to me over the years. I often wonder if my children and grandchildren will look back on their lives and cherish their memories of childhood as much as I do mine. Will their hearts flood with love when they think back on how things use to be. I want nothing more than for my children and grandchildren to have the memories of love that I have had....and I wonder if I've been able to give that to them. I know I sure try.
I don't know that I fixate on death...as I get older. Not that it hasn't crossed my mind. I just remember as a child, the memories of mother, grandmother, grandfather...a time when life seemed to be so simple. Now...here, I am the mother, and grandmother.....and I wonder what happened to all those years in-between. I often think, that if the past 30+ yrs. have gone so fast...how fast will the next 30 go....and will I be around for the next 30...considering that I'm probabably on the downside 1/2 of life now. At 52...my life is probably more than half over now....doubt that I make it to 104 hehehehe. And yeah...soon it will be me that is dying...something I don't want to think about...although I am ready to go, with Christ as my savior. But, I also think He realizes that I have alot left here on earth to share...I just pray that letting me experience these, are part of His great plan.
Age really never use to bother me much...and I don't guess it really does now. I suppose it's just as you get older, you learn about what the important things in life are...the things that matter, the things that you cherish. When I was younger...and still had all these people in my life, it wasn't that I took them forgranted...it was just that them being out of my life, seemed sooooooo far away....and now in the blink of an eye....it is gone....and nothing is left but majestic memories! I remember, as I started to age and mature, thinking about the times that I would loose my Poppy and Granny...the time they would die....and oh, how my heart would break, wondering how I was ever going to live without them in my life. I was 31 when my poppy died...and I remembering how much my heart sank. I was his first grandchild...and I was the apple of his eye...a part of me died that day. After 20 yrs of living without the love of her life...it was my Granny's turn to join him. The pain was unbearable...As Granny turned older...I would brace myself each time my mother would call....I was so afraid and aware, that I could get THE phone call at anytime. And, the night came when I did....and I couldn't believe it. I guess now, I look at the age of my mom and dad...neither who are in the best of health...especially my dad...and I find myself wondering again what I'm going to do when I receive that call! I know it's a big possibility that I could very well be facing what my mother has already faced...the loss of her mother and father...and I am approaching that period of my life.
Though the memories bring tears to my eyes...they are memories that I am so blessed to have, and ones that I cherish. As I have gotten older, realizing how important each day of life is, how quickly it can be gone, I thank God everyday for all that He's given me, Godly and Christian parents, and grandparents, those who have loved me unconditionally. For they can leave so quickly. I have a picture posted in some of my groups... of all of us last May...celebrating our birthdays. My Granny turned 97 that may, and by Aug., she was gone. I remember when my mom called me and told me that she had been taken to the hosp., and hadn't made it.....my mind flashed back to the day we left Lebanon...and I remember driving off in my car...with Granny standing and waving, and me waving back. Had I known...I would never see her again, I'd have taken the chance to stop, hug her one last time...kiss her cheek once again, and tell her how very much I loved her. But...she knows that...there is no doubt in my mind. And no douth that both her and my Poppy look down on me daily from heaven, and watch over me.
Love is MOST powerful.... it is everything in life. Without it...we are nothing! With it...we are EVERYTHING!
1 Corinthians 13 (New King James Version)
New King James Version (NKJV)
Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc.
1 Corinthians 13
The Greatest Gift
The Greatest Spiritual Gift
1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned,[a] but have not love, it profits me nothing.
4Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part. 10But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away.
11When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things. 12For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.
13And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
Footnotes:
1 Corinthians 13:3 NU-Text reads so I may boast.
Thanks to all of you for the birthday wishes!
I hope you all have a beautiful and blessed day...
Much love to you all
Lev
I remember a few years back, around my birthday, and my Granny's also.... her's was May 29th, we were talking about birthdays, and getting older. I'll never forget what she told me then.... "well I guess getting older sure beats the alternative! If I wasn't getting any older, I'd be dead!" lol Guess I'd never really thought about it that way! hahahaha She made it to 97...so I suppose I will have to start looking at it that way.
I really don't know where time goes. It seems, at times, that it moves sooooo slowly, and then at others, it seems to just fly by. I often wonder about that. I look back at about age 15...especailly, just before getting my license....and I remember feeling like 16 was NEVER going to get here, and it seemed to be an eternity before I got my license. We always seem to look forward to certain ages...16....then it's 21, so we can go out and drink! lol At the time, it seemed like it took forever for those ages to come, and now, here I am at 52....wondering where in the world the past 30 yrs. have gone to.
My babies, or at least two of them, are married, and have babies of their own. And when I look at them, it is so hard to imagine them as anything but the 2 little boys that use to run around our house...drivin' me crazy...lol. And now, here they are, fathers themselves. Moriah is 15...talkin' about driving permits....but she should still be the pretty little girl that I would dress up, and add bows to her hair. Where has it all gone?
I look back on my own life...so many of the wonderful memories that flood my mind. Memories of my mom and dad, my Granny and Poppy...My Aunt Jo...so many people, that have meant so much to me in my life. Now, so many of them are gone. It makes me feel as if parts of my life are just gone forever...never to return. Of course, there are always the memories, and they are beautiful ones...but...as I get older, I just long for the times when those memories were present day. I watched an old video that my mom had made for me...made from old home movies...when I was younger. The memories were so clear, and vivid. And it made me wish for those days again. One minute they would make me smile, and the next, tears would fill my eyes....knowing that these people are now gone from my life. All these memories have meant so much to me over the years. I often wonder if my children and grandchildren will look back on their lives and cherish their memories of childhood as much as I do mine. Will their hearts flood with love when they think back on how things use to be. I want nothing more than for my children and grandchildren to have the memories of love that I have had....and I wonder if I've been able to give that to them. I know I sure try.
I don't know that I fixate on death...as I get older. Not that it hasn't crossed my mind. I just remember as a child, the memories of mother, grandmother, grandfather...a time when life seemed to be so simple. Now...here, I am the mother, and grandmother.....and I wonder what happened to all those years in-between. I often think, that if the past 30+ yrs. have gone so fast...how fast will the next 30 go....and will I be around for the next 30...considering that I'm probabably on the downside 1/2 of life now. At 52...my life is probably more than half over now....doubt that I make it to 104 hehehehe. And yeah...soon it will be me that is dying...something I don't want to think about...although I am ready to go, with Christ as my savior. But, I also think He realizes that I have alot left here on earth to share...I just pray that letting me experience these, are part of His great plan.
Age really never use to bother me much...and I don't guess it really does now. I suppose it's just as you get older, you learn about what the important things in life are...the things that matter, the things that you cherish. When I was younger...and still had all these people in my life, it wasn't that I took them forgranted...it was just that them being out of my life, seemed sooooooo far away....and now in the blink of an eye....it is gone....and nothing is left but majestic memories! I remember, as I started to age and mature, thinking about the times that I would loose my Poppy and Granny...the time they would die....and oh, how my heart would break, wondering how I was ever going to live without them in my life. I was 31 when my poppy died...and I remembering how much my heart sank. I was his first grandchild...and I was the apple of his eye...a part of me died that day. After 20 yrs of living without the love of her life...it was my Granny's turn to join him. The pain was unbearable...As Granny turned older...I would brace myself each time my mother would call....I was so afraid and aware, that I could get THE phone call at anytime. And, the night came when I did....and I couldn't believe it. I guess now, I look at the age of my mom and dad...neither who are in the best of health...especially my dad...and I find myself wondering again what I'm going to do when I receive that call! I know it's a big possibility that I could very well be facing what my mother has already faced...the loss of her mother and father...and I am approaching that period of my life.
Though the memories bring tears to my eyes...they are memories that I am so blessed to have, and ones that I cherish. As I have gotten older, realizing how important each day of life is, how quickly it can be gone, I thank God everyday for all that He's given me, Godly and Christian parents, and grandparents, those who have loved me unconditionally. For they can leave so quickly. I have a picture posted in some of my groups... of all of us last May...celebrating our birthdays. My Granny turned 97 that may, and by Aug., she was gone. I remember when my mom called me and told me that she had been taken to the hosp., and hadn't made it.....my mind flashed back to the day we left Lebanon...and I remember driving off in my car...with Granny standing and waving, and me waving back. Had I known...I would never see her again, I'd have taken the chance to stop, hug her one last time...kiss her cheek once again, and tell her how very much I loved her. But...she knows that...there is no doubt in my mind. And no douth that both her and my Poppy look down on me daily from heaven, and watch over me.
Love is MOST powerful.... it is everything in life. Without it...we are nothing! With it...we are EVERYTHING!
1 Corinthians 13 (New King James Version)
New King James Version (NKJV)
Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc.
1 Corinthians 13
The Greatest Gift
The Greatest Spiritual Gift
1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned,[a] but have not love, it profits me nothing.
4Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part. 10But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away.
11When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things. 12For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.
13And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.
Footnotes:
1 Corinthians 13:3 NU-Text reads so I may boast.
Thanks to all of you for the birthday wishes!
I hope you all have a beautiful and blessed day...
Much love to you all
Lev
posted by Lev | 11:34 AM
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